When you feel like starting over
I always laugh when someone explains how they hate boring tasks like traffic, flossing or washing the dishes. Think about it- who in their right mind likes performing tasks that are somewhat tedious, time consuming and yields no immediate payoff?
Life consists of a series of repetitive tasks we do not want to do.
Let’s say for a week we neglected to wash our dishes. Breakfast, lunch and dinner- piled high. Obviously, the sink would fill up. Little flies would start to sniff out your kitchen. You would eventually wind up with no utensils. The residue on the dishes would build up making it harder to clean up the mess when you decided to get around to it.
At this point you will likely have to replace some of the pots and pans because the crud is just too strong. You might even want to say SCREW IT!! Get all new stuff to begin with because you are so disgusted and can’t bear to think about eating off of something bugs were crawling on.
YOU are certainly aware you could have avoided the whole incident by just washing the dishes every day. You now feel guilty for wasting your time and energy on stressing about doing the dishes, neglecting them and then spending money on new ones.
Similar trends happen to us when we start something new, such as eating differently or an exercise routine.
We are likely to start off motivated by intrinsic means or even fear. We want to fit into our clothes better or just be the best versions of ourselves. On the more frightful end, we don’t want diabetes, high blood pressure or other diseases which come along with excessive lifestyle habits.
I’m not saying if you leave a dish in the sink your impending doom is waiting for you. If you miss a day at the gym or eat a pint of ice cream it’s alright. What isn’t alright is throwing in the towel, or “starting over”. This starting over mentality tells us that we haven’t made a mistake and we just weren’t ready for the task at hand. We learn nothing valuable and we expect the journey to be perfect. We often throw so many dishes away (coaches, exercise programs, advice) because we messed up and refuse to learn from it. We refuse to take the L.
What often happens is we put a ton of pressure on ourselves about making these changes perfectly. We hate the idea of screwing up and often would rather stop washing the dishes all together (exercising/ eating healthy) and throw them all out (“starting over” or waiting for after the holidays) than accept the fact that it’s going to be boring and difficult. What you must realize is NO ONE initially wants to do most of the things they do such as waking up at 5 am to get a workout in, going to bed earlier or eating green things.
I HATE doing these things most of the time — in the moment I want to hit snooze while eating a pizza. What I LOVE is long term results. I love looking back on the process. I KNOW that my immediate actions will reap great benefits in the long run, not in the present.
YOU ARE READY, and you can keep going RIGHT NOW
There is NEVER any reason to START OVER. This isn’t a race, this is a journey. In order to reach your goals, you may think you have to be highly motivated and ‘in the right state of mind’. Fear acts as a motivation, but it lacks depth. Fear can only take us so far. The fear of being obese, weak, getting a disease or not accomplishing our goals are a bad motivational tactic. CONFIDENCE supersedes fear tenfold- and guess what, it actually works.
When you are confident in your capabilities to take on a task that will in fact be difficult, you are aware of the road blocks ahead. You decide starting over isn’t an option anymore, and you are okay with making the necessary mistakes along the way.
Stay tuned for my next post on why and how confidence works in all aspects of life.
